What will I wear to your funeral?
By Kellie Curtain
'Put your lipstick on, begin the day. It will start without you anyway.'
'What will I wear to your funeral?' 'How do I look after your orchid?'
Kellie wanted to ask her mother so many questions while she still could. When you don't go a day without speaking to someone you love, how do you say goodbye forever? It didn't bear thinking about.
When Pamela Curtain is diagnosed with cancer, her family plead with her to try everything that might give them more time. She reluctantly agrees, but on one condition. Life goes on because it has to and so does the weekly family dinner with wine and loud sibling banter.
With grace, guts and cups of tea the matriarch prepares herself and those she loves for the inevitable. Their conversations are honest, funny and at times confronting, where a shade of lipstick might be the only bright side.
This is a toast to love, friendship and the ordinary. There is no happy ending but the Curtain family discovers that there can be 'good' in goodbye. And it somehow leaves them feeling just a little victorious.
Now put on the kettle and open the wine.
Purchase from Booktopia here.
Ted Radio Hour - Moving Forward
Podcast Review: Rita Marigliani
The idea that you can ‘move on’ from loss and grief is one I always struggled with, which is why this podcast really resonated for me.
It shares the stories of people who have experienced a range of loss and who, instead of forgetting the past, have moved forward with it.
While these stories are not specifically about mother loss, the messages ring true. I found it validated how I feel about the memories of my mum and how I have incorporated them, and her loss, into my life.
This is a great one to share with well-meaning family and friends who don’t know what to say, or can’t understand how you are working through your grief.
Click here to listen.
By Hope Edelman
Although a mother's mortality is inevitable no book has discussed the profound lasting and far reaching effects of this loss until Motherless Daughters, which became an instant classic. More than twenty years later, it is still the go-to book that women of all ages look to for comfort, help, and understanding when their mother dies. Building on interviews with hundreds of mother loss survivors, Edelman's personal story of losing her mother, and recent research in grief and psychology, Motherless Daughters reveals the shared experiences and core identity issues of motherless women:
- Why the absence of a nurturing hand shapes a woman's identity throughout her lifespan
- How present day relationships are defined by past losses
- How a woman can resolve past conflicts and move toward acceptance and healing
- Why grief really is not a linear passage but an ongoing cyclical journey
- How the legacy of mother loss shifts with the passage of time
Purchase from Booktopia here.
Mum Moments & HEARTSPACE Letters to my Mother
By Judy Taylor
If you have lost someone close then you know how it feels. Grief is hard.
You may feel totally alone in your feelings, it hurts. Grief can be so overwhelming.
Judy Taylor lost her mother suddenly and found herself on a raw and confronting rollercoaster of emotions and feelings which completely took her by surprise.
She started writing a journal as a way to cope and found her honest, raw expression of feelings helped her ride those waves of grief. As she shared her journal with friends and colleagues she was touched that her words also had a profound healing affect on those dealing with the death of a loved one.
Perhaps Judy’s words can help you, too.
Purchase Mum Moments from Booktopia here.
Purchase HEARTSPACE Letters to my mother here.